Brandon and Sara

As some of you know, we travelled to Dallas on Saturday for a Celebration Memorial Service for the son of our friends, Brandon and Sara. A few have asked how the day went, and really all I could get out of my mouth was "It was incredible", and I feel like that just doesn't do justice to the situation, and it's been on my heart, so here I write.

Before I even begin, I need to explain B and Sara. I met them about 5 months into my relationship with Kevin. It was one of the first trips to Austin, Kevin's sister's wedding, and so I was getting broken into all the family and friends. Kevin had told me they were really excited to meet me, this "girl Kevin's hanging out with". I had heard so much about them, I was really more nervous to meet them than any family member. They were the friends you want to like you...the friends I knew Kevin wanted to journey with for a lifetime.  Really my only memory of them is a conversation with Brandon we had at a restaurant after the wedding. Without going into details of the conversation, I remember they brought out the best in Kevin...you know those people where all guards are down and you are free to be you? That's B and Sara. The more I've gotten to know them, it's just how it is with them, and I love it.

Brandon and Sara have a 2 1/2 year old girl named Sydney. She's a doll. Sara loved every second of being pregnant with her. She told me that she never felt sexier than when she was pregnant. Crazy, but true. About a year and half ago, they found out they were pregnant with their second, and so excited. However, she miscarried early on. As soon as they could they were trying again. A little while after we found out we were pregnant, they found out they were too. And we were so excited. At 22 weeks, right before Laurel was born, this story begins to unfold. An ultrasound revealed cysts on the Little Guy's kidneys. Each following ultrasound revealed other complications, and the decision process for Brandon and Sara began. Life outside the womb was unlikely short of a miracle. Should they try to deliver naturally? Do they deliver early? A C-section would increase the likelihood of life after birth, but it would still only be a few minutes. What do they do after the inevitable occurs? Bury their newborn? Cremate? Overwhelming decisions, that still bring tears to my eyes. So they prayed. Lots of people prayed. Kevin and I and so many others pleaded for a miracle. I'll never forget a note Sara sent out, that read " I still believe that God can perform a miracle...That he can place normal-sized fully-functioning lungs in Elliot where there were none just a week ago. That He can give him a functioning kidney, completely void of cysts, though the doctors have told us it's impossible. I believe He can. But even if He does not, I believe He will take care of us, and that He will take care of Elliot--even if that is by taking him to heaven...There is suffering and sin on this earth that my son will never have to know. He will be immediately be swept into the loving arms of Christ, and though I will long to hold him in mine, I know that there's no better place for him to be."

On Monday, April 28, the C-section took place, and Elliot Skaggs was born. He lived one hour. The entire family of both Brandon and Sara were present, and got to hold him and love on him during his brief life on earth. The memorial service that took place on Saturday was just another outpouring of love for the family, for Elliot, and for our Savior. Both Brandon and Sara had written notes to Elliot...words of love for their little man, who possibly touched more lives in his one hour than many of us will ever touch in a "normal" lifetime.  And, the family worshipped. It was by no means a funeral. It truly was a celebration. A demonstrated understanding that life is hard, and we don't understand, but we are loved, and He is good. Tears fill my eyes even now as I remember the moment that moved me most...during one of the final songs as we sang seated in our pews, from the front row, Mr. Skaggs, the proud grandfather, stands in worship, arms raised high to heaven, followed immediately by the other family members....leading us in worship of our Creator God. 

This whole situation is one that just doesn't seem to fit. Carrying a child for 8 1/2 months only for him to pass immediately to Heaven. I've thought a lot about that hour of life for Elliot over the past couple of weeks. The thing that strikes me most is that they experienced something most people never get to. We often say we "see God move", but in that moment, at 9:05 AM, God stepped into that hospital room and truly made a move. Not that He had been inactive at any point up until then, but there is no doubt of His action at that moment. He chose to take Elliot with Him. He saw that moment as the most fitting. Was that the moment Elliot was starting to feel pain? Was that the moment in which all the aunts, uncles, and grandparents had gotten to hold him? Or, was that the moment our Lord decided He was ready for Elliot to be whole...no cysts, no abnormalities, perfect.

So, that's my story of Brandon and Sara. I know it has been long, but I wanted to share it with those of you who have prayed or asked about them. Thanks for persevering to read:)... We loved them before, but oh, how much more we love them today. They have taught us more about God and His Love and His work in our lives, and they have allowed us to be a part of a journey to knowing Him in a greater way.